Samstag, 12. Mai 2012


Hello dears

I cannot tell how pissed I am right now. A couple of days ago I went to the gym but the staff there told me I could not join because I would move too soon and that I should go on Monday to talk to his boss. Gosh. Why is everything so fucking complicated in Germany? 
Furthermore I have three weeks left to decide to which University to go and what to study. I am real sick of all these phone calls in the early morning. Of course the people I am talking to are nice yet they are so slow and like. "You may call the teacher." ... great.  Anyways today it's Saturday and I cannot do anything but wait until Monday.... ORZ!

Something else that's real upsetting me is the fact that I turn to be really envious about the body of a 18 year old girl from Spain. (her blog: littlesugarcube) She can wear whatever she wants and still look like: Wow! And if I wanted to wear her pants they'd only cover my lower leg. Gosh. Seriously and then her blog is full with photos of food.
I should better not think about how I looked like when I was 18 years old. 
While sitting in front of the computer, I am really getting nervous. There are like only five months left until University starts and I am afraid that someone will point at me and call me overweight / fat / unhealthy. Of course people do not usually do this but just the thought about it makes me feel bad.

It would be real nice if you tell me who your inspiration is these days. I hope you guys doing better. Gonna take a long shower now. 

With love

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  1. I can see why you might be envious, but really sweetie, don't be. The thing is she is 18. I know that I did not look like that when I was 18. The other thing is she obviously doesn't struggle with what we do. You will meet your goals in due time hun. Just keep with it =)

  2. I don't know about assuming people don't "obviously" suffer though. Some people are very good at projecting a happy image of themselves. People generally think I'm always happy based on outward appearances, but that isn't true. I know a lot of people who have issues with food who post photos of food because of their obsession. Some of my friends pretend they love eating when they never do because they want to be thin but don't want to be asked questions. Bottomline... it's best not to assume things about people or compare too much based on those assumptions.

    I know you'll reach your goal though. It just takes patience. You have my support :)

  3. Don't be jealous sweetie. There's a huge difference between how we see ourselves and how others see us. You're not fat, and no one is going to think you are either. xx